I’d Rather Goya Robbed Me Of My Sleep Than Some Other Arsehole Son of a B*tch

Photo from Gate Theatre © Ikin Yum Photography

English-language premiere: February-March, 2014 at the Gate Theatre, London.

‘a remarkable production’ The Guardian

When you hit a crisis in finances, family and philosophy, there’s only one way to stop life from getting you down: blow your life savings on drugs and booze, take your sons on the road trip of their lives through the streets of Madrid, break into the Prado, and stare at the Black Paintings of Francisco Goya all night long.  But how do you argue with your kids when they’d prefer to find spiritual fulfilment at Disneyland?

I tell my sons, one of these nights we should go to the Prado Museum. They’d planned to go to Disneyland Paris, they say. We thought going to Disneyland Paris would be a better idea. Because, says the eldest of my two sons, the best way to understand the misery of modern man, is by spending a spell with Mickey Mouse in person (or rather an underpaid kid working 12-hour shifts, cooking in a cuddly costume with no breathing holes). Not parading past Saturn Devouring His Sons or Fight with Cudgels or anything painted by Goya, Velázquez, Bosch or El Greco.

And I say look, boys, don’t make me use your heads for f***ing footballs. F*** Disneyland.

One of these nights we’ll get in a cab and we’ll take a ride to the Prado. And on our way there we’ll pick up a friend and he’ll give us some chat as we ride. And we’ll take along something to drink, one of those perfect bottles, filled with Glenfiddich.  And a big mound of coke.

This translation of Goya was commissioned by Mark Cartwright Productions and premiered at the Gate Theatre, Notting Hill on 06 March 2014.  It was directed by Jude Christian, performed by Steffan Rodhri, and co-produced by the National Theatre Studio.  In this video, Jude and Steffan talk about the play and the production.

22 August-2 September 2017 at the Old 505 Theatre, Sydney, produced by Théâtre Excentrique.

January 28-29 and February 5-7, 2015 at Disjecta Contemporary Art Center, Portland OR, produced by Boom Arts.

Contact me for more details. 

Back to translations.